Surreality

Today I signed up for a free trial of Rhapsody, and I’m currently feeling a level of integration with technology I haven’t felt since my first iPod 5 years ago.

I’ve gone from being lost in a 46,000-track galaxy (where I can never find the song I want to hear) to being the nexus of a 9 million song universe, where the song in my head is just a stream buffer away, and I am once again in awe of everyday technology.

“Any sufficiently advanced technology will be indistinguishable from magic.”  In that case, hand me my robe and wizard hat.

I’ve dealt with many annoying congoers this weekend. Everywhere you turn, a sixteen year old 4channer yells out a meme.

It’s a curious phenomenon that I noticed in Drexel’s Digital Media program. When a reclusive socially awkward group is alone, they are actively withdrawn and avoid normal contact, seemingly due to social anxiety. When surrounded by like-minded individuals, you’d think the anxiety would fade and normal interaction could occur between abnormal individuals. This is not the case, and these individuals continue to withdraw.

I keep refering to the Otakon general populace as a sea of human refuse. The constant repetition of memes underscores this statement. I have not seen or heard an original/unique idea, costume, or conversation in the past three days. 28,000 people, none of whom have anything useful to say.

I can’t be the only person disturbed by the gravity of that last sentence, can I?

From the looks I got from those kids yesterday playing Rock Band, asking them to play Black Crowes instead of Avenged Sevenfold was like asking to jam a flathead screwdriver in their urethras. The kid who was gonna drum just stood up and said, “I’ll wait for the next song.”

I’ve just come to the conclusion that Rock Band is a game for people over 21. It’s great for getting your friends together and rocking out like idiots. It’s why we had a blacklight, strobe light, and 30lbs of dry ice on my birthday.

For these kids, who are probably a close analogue to your average LIVE gamer, it’s more, “If we can gold star this nu-metal song, all those fat chicks over there will swallow our nuts. LET’S FUCKING DO THIS!!!!”

Hopefully, these kids will eventually grow out of it, but I honestly question the ability of a generation that grew up with the Internet as it is today to move on and do something with their lives.

I think I’m taking the camera today to take some amazing pictures of things that look awful. Con opens in 45 minutes.

“Unfortunately, I fell in love with her vagina.” – drunken bum on the street.

So one thing I think needs to be addressed is the Jailbait Factor. Yes, I have a girlfriend, but I see nothing wrong with apppreciating fine cleavage. Unfortunately, there is no easy way to tell the age of the ample bosom before you. There are blue wristbands given out for admission to 18+ events, but that doesn’t cover all of the 18+ crowd, only those attending the events. Is it so much to ask for those to be mandatory, so I can look at boobs while maintaining peace of mind.

8:55 PM

There’s a fine line between edgy/shocking and tasteless. 300+ lb bald kid in the flimsy $5 wannabe-Fedora and “School Shooting Tour” T-Shirt, guess where you stand?

On the front, there’s a school crossing sign with kids running. On the back? Dates, locations and body counts of high profile school shootings.

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

I said it yesterday, and this winner, along with the furry ravers, will make me reiterate it: I am afloat in a sea of human refuse. Fuck you all.

Spent a few hours this mornig playing The World Ends With You. Really good game that manages to not be a typical JRPG.

Sitting in the lobby, I found a winner wearing a dog collar. Can’t upload to the blog, for some reason, so the pix will go on Facebook.

Also, Facebook’s syndication for Wordpress doesn’t catch my updates. Be sure to check the blog for updates.

11:00 AM

Found Myself in an anime music video competition screening. First video uses Michael Jackson. Not just Michael Jackson, but “Scream”, quite possibly his lamest single with Janet on backing vocals. People behind me singing along. This song never really goes anywhere. In a 20-sec loop, you’ve heard all it has to offer. It’s at least 5 minutes long.

Second video uses P.O.D. Kids still singing along with every fucking word. “Boom” was a shitty song in 2002, and syncing clips of ‘Gundam Series 3948372′ doesn’t help it any.

No idea what the 3rd song is, but whiny vocals and shitty piano over a WHOMP WHOMP WHOMP techno beat. Disappointing, I’ve been told ‘Fushigi Yuugi’ isn’t actually a terrible anime series.

Next one uses ‘Pump It’ by Black Eyed Peas. I’ve got a group of kids behind me giving each other a whole overview of this series. It sounds like absolute shit.

Words to live by: “Why does everybody hate Linkin Park?” – Some retarded kid behind me at this AMV contest. He didn’t understand why everyone walked out on the Linkin Park video.

“I need crab cakes, but I want to eat them high.” – words of wisdom from Alfred Blackman

6:34 PM

It’s beyond impossible to neither stare nor look creepy in the presence of a chick cosplaying Leeloo from The Fifth Element.

Welcome once again to the land of “That Guy.” 18,000 unwashed fucktards competing to be the wittiest retard off the Internet.

Here we have the pseudo-pedos congregating with the WoW addicts. The camwhores flirting with the undatable, pathetic Internet males. And they all quote memes.

Fuck you all, I’m back.

Harry Knowles clones, babyfaced college students and bitches with the wrong kind of titties all out. There is no socially acceptable reprisal I can inflict upon you all. Thank you for drowning me in your wasted potential.

At least it takes my mind off work.

“I’m shooting mind bullets at every car in front of me.” Sweet Jesus, what the fuck?

Also, mad props to the Nüttskvååtch for being the cigar smoking asshole in a crowded line.

Tons of people at least 10 years older than me flashing their badges at each other and yelling, “Do you know this anime!?!?” followed by, “Weren’t you on MTV once?” “No, but I’m Internet-famous.”

What the fuck. I am afloat on a sea of human waste.

When people ask what I’m doing with my life and I tell them how much I hate my job, the standard response is always, “At least you have a job.”  What the fuck does that accomplish?  If I consume eight hours of my day at a job that is incredibly mentally and emotionally taxing, I am not better off.

I work as a web developer.  This is my second job in this field.  This is not a career I’m trying to make for myself.  I have this job because a recruiter fucked up when looking at my resume the first time around and, following the advice of everyone around me, “A job’s a job.”  Here I am, two years later, doing that same job at a different company.

It’s not just that I’m doing the wrong job.  I get a paycheck every week.  I get a paycheck every week that doesn’t even allow me to break even on my bills.  I’ve been working for two years, and I am still making more than 10% less than my starting requirements after college.  Neither job has given me just compensation for my time and effort.

My current performance evaluation at my job would say that I’m lakcing in dedication.  I’m lacking in dedication toward a job that calls me between 8-11PM and asks me to work on fixing up  a client’s site for several hours.  Did I mention I’m salaried, and therefore don’t get paid overtime for this work?

The best thing I can hope for in a day is to come home and forget about how stressed my work makes me.  This has taken a massive toll on my environment, my happiness, and my relationships.

It’s been two months since I moved into my new apartment, and boxes of my stuff are still in the living room.  I get home from work, and the thought of unpacking doesn’t even occur to me.  It’s not that I don’t want to unpack everything.  It’s not that I like having a living space that looks like a shithole.  I simply can’t bring myself to get my life organized because I come home nearly every day on the verge of tears.

I’m never happy anymore.  The best I can hope for is ‘momentarily forgetful.’  Saturday nights, the nights that used to be a source of enjoyment to both my friends and myself  have suffered for it.  I get drunk.  I don’t really get happy.  We don’t laugh as much anymore.  Our weekend parties have gotten much more serious lately, and people tend to talk about their problems that always seem more severe than mine.  With the way I feel all the time, I’m sorry, I love you all, but the last thing I need on a Saturday is hearing about what’s wrong with everyone else’s life.

I need a way out.  I need something meaningful to do with my life.  I need a new job that doesn’t leave me a stressful wreck at 5PM every day.  I need something that can pay my bills and allow me to start getting out of debt.  I need to get back to feeling like myself again – the fun, the laughter, being the coolest motherfucker alive.

Thank you for reading this if you made it through, but please, more importantly: HELP

Waiting in line, I hear the inane chatter of tech-trendy thirtysomethings name dropping social networking sites. Technology drives me to hate those I’ve never met more and more each day.

It scares me to think what I’ll be like in ten years.

I have just tried the following:

Dock Street Hop Garden Double IPA: It’s like Dock Street made a Hop Devil. Try if you’re a fan of either.
Erie Smoked Railbender Ale: A brilliant variation on the traditional Railbender.
Nodding Head O’Tay: Certainly not something I expected. Must try.
Nodding Head Spring Ale: Good, but not better than Blue Moon’s Rising Moon Spring Ale.
Rock Bottom King’s Wit: Tastes exactly like a Wit should
Stoudt’s Blonde Double Mai Bock: Light and crisp, very sweet
Yuengling Bock: An excellent heavy beer well outside of Yuengling’s usual.
Lancaster Brewing Company Shoo-Fly Porter: Very smoky and full-bodied. Tastes like Pipeline Kona.
Lion Brewing Company Stout: Heavy and smoky. Drinks like a porter, oddly enough.
Lion Brewing Company Winter Warmer: Rich and textured. Very sunny and flavorful.
McKenzie Brewhouse La Faute Farmhouse: Slightly sweet with a bitterly busy aftertaste. Can’t win ‘em all.
Bethlehem/Allentown Brew Works Blast Furnace Imperial Stout: Thick and deep like a stout should be.
Penn Brewery Weizen Bock: Spicy and smooth at first, but finishes a tad empty.
Roy Pitz Ludwig’s Revenge: Bitter start, bitter finish. Bad taste in my mouth.